Translations
I don’t know about all girls, but here are some translations of what my friends and I really mean when we say the following. Take note, boys.
–
Says: “You look good.”
Means “I want you.”
–
Says: “Haha, I bet your girlfriend wouldn’t like that.”
Means: “Please tell me you don’t have a girlfriend.”
–
Says: “No worries.”
Means: “Lots of worries. Be very worried.”
–
Says: “She’s soooo pretty.”
Means: “Tell me I’m pretty.”
–
Says: “I totally understand.”
Means: “I’m so fucking confused.”
–
Says: “Take your time.”
Means: “Hurry up.”
–
Says: “I feel like I’m not your type.”
Means: “You’re a tool.”
–
Says: “I should be free later.”
Means: “I’m free now, but that’s too easy.”
–
Says: “Just let me know if you want to talk.”
Means: “Please just tell me everything you’re thinking.”
–
Says: “Hi.”Means: “I’m pissed.”
–
Says: “Your haircut will grown in nicely.”
Means: “Your haircut looks like absolute shit right now.”
–
Says: “I’ll just forget about you, I guess, if that’s what you want.”
Means: “I want you to like me so much.”
–
Says: “Yeah, sure. I’ll just come over to your place again.”
Means: “Ask me on a date.”
–
Says: “I want to touch your face.”
Means: “You have no idea how much I like you.”
–
Says: “I mean, you know I like you.”
Means: “You seriously have no idea how much I like you.”
–
Says: “You’re just not getting it.”Means: “I don’t want to tell you how I really feel.”
–
Says: “It’s fine.”
Means: “It’s not fine, fix it.”
–
Says: “It’s snowing, let’s go for a walk.”
Means: “Kiss me in the snow.”
–
Says: “Are you okay?”
Means: “I know you’re not okay.”
–
Says: “‘I’m into you.”
Means: Could be option A, B, C, or D from previous post: “I’m Into You”
–
Says: “Fuck you.”
Means: “Fuck you.”
Thank you.
Reconsider
Remember me I’m the one that’s back from over
Times gone by and I’m still so far from over
You reappear like you’d never been gone
I lose composure
You’re touching me like you have no desire for closure
Reconsider
Did you like awake like I did
Stayed up until the stars didn’t recognize me
So long
I waited so long
Now you don’t see the skies that I do
My sun becomes your moon
For a familiar love I have familiar love
Can’t sleep?
Call Your Girlfriend – Robyn
I wish I could just dance out how I feel about you. That would be easy.
“I’m Into You”
How I feel when you say “I’m into you”
You’re into me, I know, you’ve told me a thousand times. But what the hell does that mean? It could mean anything. Next time you tell me you’re into me, I’m going to hand you these options and tell you to circle one.
OPTION A:
I’m intrigued, but I’ve only known you for a couple days, so I’m just gonna say “I’m into you”.
In Option A, “I’m into you” could really be the beginning of something, but it’s just too early to tell. You think you like me, but you haven’t known me long enough to commit to telling me that you actually like me. Saying that you’re into me is your way of telling me that you’re interested in me, would like to continue spending time with me, and see if your being into me develops into something more once you get to know me better. You telling me that you’re into me is your way of keeping me around and interested in you long enough for you to get to know me well enough to see if you’re actually INTO ME, in the sense that Option B offers…
OPTION B:
When I say “I’m into you”, I mean I really like you, I’m just really shy.
In Option B, you’re really just trying to tell me that you really like me, but you don’t know how to say that because you’re too shy. It doesn’t matter how long you’ve known me, or if you even know why you like me, but you really like me A LOT. However, you’re way to shy to just tell me that you like me, so you say “I’m into you” in hopes that I will be able to read your mind and understand that you’re telling me you really like me and hope that I really like you back. If you weren’t super shy, you would be all over me and making it very clear to me how much you like me, but you just don’t have that in you. Option B is confusing as hell, but generally better than Option C…
OPTION C:
I really like you, but I have another conflict that’s holding me back from telling you how I really feel.
In Option C, conflicts usually include having a girlfriend, being scared of how much you actually like me, or maybe just having too much going on in your life to get involved with me. Whatever the conflict is, it’s keeping you from telling me how you really feel because you either think it’s not acceptable, or don’t think you have the time to let yourself feel this way. Option C is generally the worst when the conflict is you having a girlfriend. This means that you like me, but you’re committed to someone else, and the chances of you wanting to give up whatever you have with her just to see if you might find something special and better in me are slim. However, Option C is still better than Option D…
OPTION D:
I’m gay, but I don’t want you or anyone to know, so I’m just gonna tell you “I’m into you” to cover up the fact that I would never really be into you or anyone of your gender, ever.
To all girls: If you have any sneaking suspicion that Option D may be coming into play, just walk away.
To Guys: How girls say no when they can’t just say: “I’m not interested”
In response to the question: “Is it just me, or do things seem different? Haha jw no worries!”
- (First of all, there never were things…)
- (Second, don’t text like that)
- Sorry, I’ve just been really busy lately!
- Things are just going a bit too fast.
- Haha, I’m just not used to texting so much
- Ah I keep forgetting to charge my phone!
- I’ve just needed some “girl” time lately
- I’ve just needed some “me” time lately
- I’ve just needed some “not you” time lately
- It’s just you, no worries
- Can we just be friends for a while?
- I’m into girls
- I just feel like I’m so not your type!!
- I’ve been really PMS (also an attempt to scare you off).
- Sorry, who is this? Got a new phone.
- No response.
- 3+ hours later: Ah, sorry never saw that text. But, what’s up?
- I’m just really used to being single.
- You’re not gay? (Give up on her completely)
- I went over my texting plan (has unlimited texting).
- You’re really not my type.
More Than Friends? Since When?
Where is the line between friendly conversation and “leading on” drawn? It seems to me that guys draw it in a different hemisphere than girls do.
All girls know that girls can be bitches we sometimes want to avoid at all costs. There can be too much drama, too much gossip, or just too much girl in the air. This is when we run to our guy friends to remind us that there are less hormonal people living in this world. But why is there is often the confusing miscommunication between guys and girls about friendship remaining friendship? Why can’t we just have our guy friends to go to when we need to without the awkwardness of misunderstandings getting in the way? Where is the line drawn before the miscommunication begins?
I know I’ve always been a flirtatious person, but I don’t think that it would be accurate to say that I lead every guy that I talk to believe that I am being more than friends. There seems to be a limit on how many days in a row and how many days per week a girl can spend with the same guy before the times spent hanging out become regular rendezvous.
Then come the differences between different activities. Does going for a walk during the day vs. a day at night make a difference? Is there a distinction between a walk on a cold, dry night and walking on a snowy night? Are you (guys) more likely to think that I’m interested in you as more than a friend if I ask you to help me study for a test? Or if my friends and I come to sit with you and your friends in the dining hall for a lack of other tables? What is it that makes the difference?
What would make you think I want to kiss you while we’re doing homework? And what makes you think it’s cool to say “so are you gonna kiss me now or what?” when we’ve only seen each other in a couple of classes during the semester? Our lines are definitely drawn in very different places; but why?
25 Things That Keep College Students Alive
DON’T GET LIKE THIS
- Naps
- Remembering that food outside of the dining hall exists
- Hot Professors
- Learning something interesting among everything that is not at all
- Caffeine
- Headphones that make everyone you hate disappear
- Pretending your double is a single
- Remembering you have friends
- Laughing at kids who use Razor scooters around campus
- Netflix
- Microwaves
- Identifying at least one person you’re attracted to in each of your classes
- Pretending you’re attending your first choice school
- Forgetting what good hygiene is
- The back row of a lecture hall
- Girls: neglecting to shave your legs during the winter months
- Guys: Thinking mustaches are hot
- Double shots
- Receiving pictures of your pets doing funny things from your parents/siblings
- Classes where laptops are allowed
- Pretending to be hipster for about a week and then realizing you’re not
- Deciding for yourself which assignments are required
- Ramen noodles
- Wikipedia
- Sex
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